I heard from my Dad down in Florida today. He’s been down lately – women trouble. Dad lives on the Gulf, just 15 mins from the bluest water eyes can tolerate without bursting from the joy of it. These days, Isaac looms large. Dad’s preparing for the possibility of heading for the nearest shelter to wait the storm out. Myself? Have been in creation mode, building Sing For Me, a music (and music industry) specific site. Got to thinking about what it takes (and what it has already taken) to rebuild after tragedy or loss.
Be it a home, a business, a life, or even just a silly blog, building or rebuilding is an act of creation (or self re-creation). It’s also a “go fuck yourself”.
In remastering the sounds and actions of life one can, when need be, say “go fuck yourself” to any and all forces that have stood in the way.
The forces facing him that, in their failure to hold him down led to Hunter’s awakening and to his decision to remaster his life – psychiatric ‘problems’, false friends, spiritual/philosophical conflict, horrendous family dynamics, collapsing physical health – well… – much of that is behind him. Picking up, brushing off, moving on, these are different issues that loom as large as Isaac does for Dad. Dad has a shelter to head to. Hunter prays that all will be ok for him. Hunter is on the hunt for the materials from which he can build his own shelter from storms that threaten.
Much of the raw materials needed when an individual rebuilds are of the immaterial sort – the very ethereal ‘psychic’ or ‘spiritual’ somethings that loss and tragedy often take away.
After much handwringing and spiritual battle Hunter discovered following his ‘awakening’ that these somethings were still there, thanks mostly to GOD.
The forces that challenged him or held him back? The spiritually and philosophically dead family members and former friends he once held on to despite their negative influence? The psychiatric and epistemelogical hell that bound him to distortions? The ill physical health? The self denial (and denial of Self)? The internal crisis’? Still around, but hardly looming. Not when Hunter can remaster life, can move on, and can say ‘fuck you’.
Sniperhunter2012, Sing for Me, Hunter’s lyric and other writings, as well as other projects on the horizon, are merely a beginning. They are a ‘go fuck yourself’ to the old Self who is no longer enough for him. They are a ‘go fuck yourself’ to those who thought the Self Hunter once was could or would withdraw from life, and that he’d take the parts that became the remastered Hunter with him.
Most importantly, the remastering of this life is a soul searching, gut deep, GOD inspired and GOD driven ‘Go and Fuck Your Fucking deceitful, hateful, destructive Self’ to the darkness which, when Hunter forgets the Source of his life, still works at sucking Hunter in.
It seeks to suck all of us in.
For that, Sniperhunter2012 says to the Dark: ‘go fuck yourself’.